Monsters

by Teresa Finney

I got really upset today about well, misogyny in general. I’m not sure what’s going on but it’s like up until now I’ve had somewhat of a dim understanding of what it truly means to be living in a man’s world. And recently it’s just hit me like running into a brick wall. It’s overwhelming and if I think about it too much, I get upset like I did today.

A lot of bullshit has happened to me because of misogyny. I am not the only one. The facts are: I was raped in Oakland three years ago. Last year, a man followed me home with his pants unbuttoned and his dick out. The list goes on and on and it bums me out because how the fuck can it not?

I called one of my guy friends to try and get some sort of understanding or perspective and he said, “Since when did you become such an activist?” As if getting upset about being treated like shit is activism and not just being human. But then I thought well okay I guess this is activism and why should I feel bad about that?

My tolerance level for this kind of shit is nonexistent now. I just absolutely refuse to let anyone, man or woman, treat me with disrespect. And it’s not even that I never believed that I deserved better than what I was getting because I’ve ALWAYS known that I do deserve 10000000%. It’s just that when you use other people to fill the voids in your life, you are willing to put up with all kinds of monstrous shit. People can be monsters to one another. I don’t know how to reconcile any of this except by not being another monster.

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